There's No Such Thing As An Alpha Male

Eric Trump recently suggested that when his father, Donald Trump, bragged about grabbing women's genitals without consent, it was an example of "two alpha guys in a thing."

In addition to shedding some light on how Trump's son views his father and manhood, it's also interesting because "alpha males" aren't actually a thing.

As the writer Saladin Ahmed pointed out, the concept of "alpha male" wolves that assert dominance over their pack through aggression comes from a debunked model of lupine social groups.

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Saladin Ahmed 

✔@saladinahmed

a reminder that the scientist who coined the term 'alpha male' to describe wolves abandoned it as useless years ago http://www.davemech.org/news.html 

8:32 AM - 12 Oct 2016

 
•  3,1073,107 Retweets
 
•  3,3743,374 likes

David Mech introduced the idea of the alpha to describe behavior observed in captive animals. Alphas, he wrote in his 1970 book "The Wolf: Ecology and Behavior of an Endangered Species," win control of their packs in violent fights with other males.

But, as he outlined in a 1999 paper, he's since rejected that idea in light of research into the behavior of wolves in the wild.

In nature, Mech writes, wolves split off from their packs when they mature, and seek out opposite-sex companions with whom to form new packs. The male and female co-dominate the new pack for a much simpler, more peaceful reason: They're the parents of all the pups.

Mech writes on his website (with the lovely title Wolf News and Info) that his original book is "currently still in print, despite my numerous pleas to the publisher to stop publishing it."

Another Twitter user, Mike Westphal, pointed out another paper on the misuse of the phrase "alpha males" to describe breeding roosters.

12 Oct

Saladin Ahmed 

✔ @saladinahmed

a reminder that the scientist who coined the term 'alpha male' to describe wolves abandoned it as useless years ago http://www.davemech.org/news.html  pic.twitter.com/MeaFZG4Yei

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Mike Westphal @mfwestphal

@saladinahmed @GreatDismal...and let us not forget that the alpha concept was first applied to female chickens, not male wolves pic.twitter.com/ZE5Goy70Ny

12:09 PM - 12 Oct 2016

 
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In the 2003 book "Sexual Selections: What We Can and Can't Learn about Sex from Animals," the biologist Marlene Zuk points out that social groups of hens do have "pecking orders." That is, hierarchies among the females with dominance asserted through pecking.

But roosters are not part of those social groups, Zuk writes, and the idea that the top hen is somehow an "alpha male" bizarrely misgenders the dominant bird.

All of which is to say: Humans who enjoy the idea of "alpha males" might want to keep in mind that there isn't really any such thing. And to the extent the term has any meaning at all, it describes the behavior of captive, lonely creatures.

Why We Need Alpha Males

Somebody has to fight the wolves.

My colleague, Annie Holmquist, discovered some statistics concerning the decline in masculinity that have troubled Pine Tree State since the instant I looked over them. Here’s the key a part of her piece:

“In recent years, a gently trending topic of debate has been the question, ‘Where have all the lads gone?’ whereas there ar variety of theories on the solution, a British survey simply free by YouGov might shed some light-weight on the problem.

Among different things, the survey asked participants concerning their impressions of the word “masculinity” and located a shocking people gap:

‘Both young men and young ladies have a lower opinion of 'masculinity' than older individuals, however young men ar harsher critics of the thought than young ladies. In distinction, the bulk of young men (58%) have a positive impression of 'femininity', as do the bulk of young ladies (55%). Overall 'femininity' encompasses a internet quality score of +56 compared to +44 for 'masculinity'.’”

And the chart: 

For those who believe the patriarchy is the root of much evil in the world, these numbers are probably cause for celebration. But perhaps not. While young men are giving up on their manhood, women still seem to want it.

As Annie asked, “Where have all the good men gone?” Well, they’ve been beaten down. Many of them lack a strong father at home, having been raised by a single mother. The education system does little to nothing to help boys grow into good men. On TV, in movies, and in commercials, when do they see a strong, virtuous male? Only two come close to the traditional portrayals of strong, men. One is Captain America. And even he is a super hero, not a real man. Yet we can see just how much things have changed by how his mannerisms and language stand out compared to a Tony Stark or any other male character. He is both refreshing and an anachronism. Chris Kyle of American Sniper is another. But he, too, strikes the modern senses as a relic of a different age. 

Even fashion is doing everything it can to make young men effeminate with skinny jeans and clothing that purposefully minimizes the male physique. We’ve come to live in Garrison Keillor’s Lake Wobegon, “where all the women are strong, all the men are good looking, and all the children are above average."

While it may be clichéd, there’s a lot of truth in the opening monologue of the father in American Sniper. There is evil, there are wolves, and a society needs strong, virtuous men – masculine men – to keep order and protect the weak. And it, too, seems to be an affront to today's culture. 

While we like to pretend things are different in the 21st century and we’ve progressed, the truth is that we have not. Human nature is still human nature. World War II won’t be the last world war. Hitler, Tojo, Stalin, Mao, ISIS, and the rest won’t be the last bad guys. Just like in the past, as we see in the Middle East and Africa today, the wolves are often quite powerful, raping and pillaging, enslaving and conquering.

But even when we’re not confronted with these great battles of the ages, we are challenged by the wolves in our daily life. There are, of course, the temptations of the heart, but there are also those will always prey upon the weaker. If the good are not stronger than the wolves, what will stop them?

Democracy on its own certainly won’t. If we’re honest, democracy – like all societies – requires alpha males to keep order and to enforce the values of the society against those who would act on their own “wills to power”. Vote all you want, but if no one follows up the laws with force, they are meaningless.

Of course, it’s also important to note that when we talk of needing masculinity and strong men, we not only recognize biological reality, but that we also call for virtuous behavior. We need strong men who hold to their duties to their families, to support and protect their wives and children, who act with honor to those around them, who pursue truth, beauty, and goodness.

Alas, to have such men, we must get back to thinking about and celebrating such things. Save for a few examples, don’t look to Hollywood, the media, or the education system to do so. If we want strong men, then virtuous men and women will have to take it upon themselves to do the job.

When You Love A Person Who Comes From A Broken Family

 When You Love A Person Who Comes From A Broken Family 

When you meet someone who comes from a broken family you probably won’t know it right away. They’ll do their best to blend in, to watch their words, to make sure they seem like everyone else. It’s a habit they’ve picked up over the years. How easy it is to look like all the rest. How easy it is to perform the same dance and routine.

Wear the right clothes. Say the right things. Don’t let your guard down. Never allude to the fact there’s something missing.

And what is missing? It’s the question that continues to haunt them. Was it losing their parent at a young age? Was it the divorce, the abuse, the memories that can’t seem to go away? Was it because they had to grow up faster than everyone else? Not every broken person shares the same story and their story lives inside of them triumphantly defiant, an anchor holding the weight of their heart down, but the hollowness feels eerily similar all the same. They don’t know how to quite pinpoint when it all seemed to fall apart. All they know is that they fell. Hard.

When you start dating someone from a broken family at first it might all seem too easy. That’s because it is. You’ll ask them about their upbringing, their background, what their family’s like, and without blinking they’ll gloss over the ugly details with just enough relevant information you’ll actually believe you’re getting the real story. It’s not that they’re trying to be deceptive or misleading. They just know it’s easier this way. For both of you.

They know no one wants to hear about the long nights spent in the hospital waiting room wondering if their father’s okay and no one wants to talk about how their mother fucked them up or how their sibling was an addict or about how the pain from a broken home still lingers in the back of their mind regardless how many times they will it away. No, none of these are great first date topics. Even second, third, fifth dates just never seem appropriate for this kind of insight into their life. They’ve inherently always felt strange, in a way they don’t know how to communicate, in a way they hope won’t make you walk away from them and deem them unloveable forever.

In the beginning they’ll keep it up – this nervous charade. Letting you in just enough to know the way their lips taste when they get drunk enough to kiss you in public but just far away you’ll never know what they’re like in the morning when their hair is messy and they’re quiet in their movements. It’s the game they play keeping you close enough to the wall but never so close you might actually get the chance to break through. It’s not fair, they know, but they aren’t sure how to love someone in any other way.

By now they’ve learned the subtle way to bite the inside of their lip and let the blood flow when you mention your family, the home you grew up in, the holiday traditions you’ve known for years. These things make them uneasy, jealous, even a bit threatened, in a way you’ll never be able to understand. They don’t know what that’s like – to know you can go back to the same address you knew as a kid. They don’t know what that’s like – to know you can go back to the same people you knew as a kid. Stability has always come at a cost to them and because of that they’ve learned to never expect anything from anyone.

They’ll keep it up and keep it up until you’re both exhausted and weary, rolling around in bed sheets, laughing about something completely mundane, when they realize in a moment they’ve let their guard down. A moment that means nothing to you can mean everything to them. They’ve been longing for this – this undividedness and sense of belonging they can actually touch. So they think for a moment maybe this is a place they can get comfortable – the space between you and them isn’t that far, really, when they think about it. They wonder for a moment if they could even call this space with you home, and if, for once, they might actually have found something real, something tangible in another human being. Immediately they push the thought away and remember they’re not good enough for something like that. A home. Love. A relationship that could actually work. No, these are not the things that happen to bad people, to broken people, to people who come from an unconventional home.

So that’s what you must remember when you love a person from a broken family – there will be days when they simply feel like they don’t deserve you or your love or this beautiful life you’ve created together. It’s the feeling deep down on their darkest days that they’ll never be enough. When you love a person from a broken family don’t try to fix their issues or understand everything about where they came from – just a little bit of space for them flourish is all they need to grow.

I Don’t Want To Just Be ‘Talking’, I Want To Be Loving

 I Don’t Want To Just Be ‘Talking’, I Want To Be Loving 

It seems like our generation is obsessed with “talking.” We like “talking” because it’s casual. It means no commitments. It means we can get dinner three days in a row and then ignore each other’s texts for the next week. Then get dinner again. Repeat. Recycle. Always moving in one place

Casually texting, casually chatting, casual dates, casual sex, casual talking. Nothing is serious. Nothing is permanent. Nothing is set in stone, rather etched softly in sand. We are told that “talking” is great. Because we can talk to the cute guy who works in the office suite across from us. And the curly haired boy from Tinder. And our old flame from back home. We can keep talking, talking, talking, until our vocal chords are fried and we have nothing left to text back.
But I’m tired of always talking.

I don’t just want someone to text at 2:00am, I want someone to text when I have a bad day and need someone to cheer me up. I don’t just want to just get dinner for one stray night, but enough times to memorize someone’s favorite food and drink orders. I don’t just want to just keep texting, I want to start living.

I am tired of cutting off fun conversation in the name of “keeping it cool” and going on fun dinners that end with nothing besides a “let’s do it again.” I do want to do it again, mark me down for every Friday for a while.

I am tired of ambiguous labels and ironic questions from friends who ask “what are you guys?” Because I don’t know. Nobody does.

I am tired of trying to balance multiple conversations with multiple people who also have multiple people to text back after me. I am tired of balancing, of calculating, of… “talking.”

And I’m not saying that I’m ready to commit my whole life to someone, but I am ready for more than a few hours, or a few days. I am ready for more than just talking my life away.
I am ready to start loving.

I am ready to laugh uncontrollably with someone, at jokes that only the two of us understand. I am ready to read my books leaning against someone’s legs, relishing every opportunity to be close. I am ready to not just show up for dates, but experience a relationship. I am ready to not have my smile fade when it’s time for us to go our separate ways.

I am ready to build a bond with someone that goes beyond “hanging out” and responding to each other’s snapchats. I am ready to give myself to someone, and see if someone will give themselves to me. I am ready to stop guarding my heart and hedging my bets.

And I don’t know if it will work out, but I am ready to try.

Why Rough Sex Makes Me Love My Boyfriend More Than Anything

 Why Rough Sex Makes Me Love My Boyfriend More Than Anything 

Of all the guys I have dated, none of them have made me feel as happy and loved as the one who others might say treats me the “worst”. John likes it rough. Like, calling me a ‘slut’ and leaving bruises on my ass rough.

He studied biology in college and once told me that one thing that really got him off was placing his hand on a woman’s neck during sex. He’d press his thumb against whatever vein is there and press down. Then, when he gets the girl off there’s like a sudden rush of blood there and he can feel the physical proof that he’s made her orgasm. He likes having that kind of ownership over my body.

When I met him I’d experienced different sides of the spectrum of how men like to have sex. Some like it soft, with as much foreplay as I do, while others were completely emotionally detached (which was no fun for me). I found that most men like at least a little force, if only when they’re really close to cumming. This was always the hottest part, the vivid memory I’d play over in my head again and again the next day — the moment they started to lose control over their better senses and their animal nature took over. It communicated that something about me had made these men so desirous they couldn’t help but be a bit primal about it. What isn’t hot about that?

John brought that feeling to a whole new level. Every time he walks by me in the apartment he grabs me like I’m his and he has to have me.

Often when we have sex it doesn’t start as us being in bed. I’ll be making us dinner and he’d come up behind me and press his body into mine, playing a game to see if he could distract me from my task at hand. With his body draped over mine and me pressed into a counter he’d use one hand to grab a fist full of hair and the other to roughly grab at my breasts, pulling them free from my shirt and bra. When he kisses me that way it’s like my entire body is enveloped by his. It makes me feel entirely wanted and loved.

Other times we’ll be on the couch or in bed and he’ll pull my hand over and drop it on his cock, his silent way of saying “you are mine, and I will use you as I please.” I’ll massage him for as long as I can stand it, before I need to put him in my mouth. On all fours while he lays beneath me he’ll grind his hips to get himself deeper in me and position me until he can reach his arm and me and fuck me roughly with his fingers until I’m gasping all over his dick.

Has has a special album in his iPhone that’s just photos of my ass in varying states of redness. He’ll have me lay ass up on the bed while he spanks me as many times as it takes for him to be satisfied with the color I turn.

Once he sent me a text at work that just said, “Don’t plan on sitting down tomorrow.”

There’s something about a man that knows he wants you and doesn’t treat you like you’re going to break. He cares too much to have some soft, gentle touch. He has confidence in you. He views you as his equal partner in the strong and dizzying act of physically expressing a strong and dizzying romantic love.

So much of modern dating culture is built around the concept of being cool and chill and never being the one who cares more. But you can’t have rough sex with someone while also being chill. You can’t deny that their body makes you feel, do, and say some insane things. There’s no ambiguity, just the refreshing security of knowing someone is totally and completely into you.

What If I Told You I Missed You

 What If I Told You I Missed You 

When I tell you I miss you don’t get that confused with pining after you. In that moment, when we’re speaking, I miss you. I don’t sit around in sweatpants, eating ice cream, wishing you were here and my life is unfulfilling without you… anymore. I don’t think about you every day like I used too. You’re not a memory that appears in my head constantly. I don’t wonder where you are or what you’re doing.

When your name pops up on my iPhone screen I’m momentarily sent back to when your name was a constant. When you weren’t just a memory but my reality. When you weren’t just letting me walk away without so much as hint of wanting to stop me. But yet you still talk to me. You even tell me that you miss me. That sucks.

It sucks to let someone go. To not fight for them. But then to tell them on a regular basis that you miss them. You didn’t have to miss me. You don’t have to miss me. You could have just had me. But that was your decision to make it me feel like I wasn’t worth it.
I wasn’t worth your time. I wasn’t worth arguing for.

But I have major faults in this too. I have so many of them. My ego is hard to deal with. I know that. We both knew that during and after every argument we got into. My ego is damaging but my pride is destroying. I didn’t need you and I made damn sure you knew that. I made sure that when it comes to my life, that I make the decisions and you, well you get what’s leftover.

My ego. My pride. It’s evident that I can’t say it. I can’t even let you think that maybe sometimes I do pine for you. That sometimes I do wear sweatpants, eat ice cream and think about how amazing it would be if you were here. That I wish I could show you all of the new things in my world you’re missing. That letting you go is something I struggle with daily.

That missing you has become so natural that it’s just a feeling I bury deep within me.

We both know that I’ll never come back to you with my heart in my hands begging you to love me. That was pretty clear the last time we talked. I’m strong and I’m tough so you don’t get to see the inside pieces of my heart anymore. The pieces that I’ve been trying to glue back together. The ones I assumed would magically fix themselves after time and miles between us.

But it doesn’t work that way. Miles and time do work if you’re willing to actively move on. If you’re willing to put in the work to let the other person go. To be completely honest, I’m not ready yet. I’m not ready to pretend that seeing your name on my phone or in my inbox doesn’t make my heart flutter because you want to talk to me. That you want to see how I am. That you still give a shit after all this time.

And really that’s all my ego needs.
I need to know that I had an effect on your life the same way you had on mine.

So is it ego or feelings that keep me holding onto you. Wanting to hear you tell me just one more time how great you think I am. Do I miss you or do I miss the way you manage to always say the right things?

It’s both. My feelings are real. They have to be. And as I have this internal struggle on paper it makes me realize why you let me go in the first place. My never ending back and forth about who I am, what I want and my feelings for you aren’t fair to you.

So I don’t pine for you, I crave you. I crave the feelings that were once so raw and so real to me. They seem like such a distant memory that they almost don’t feel real anymore. You and I don’t exist anymore. We never will again. So for now I’ll just miss you. Because that’s just where I am. And that’s OK.

The Unspoken Rule Of Modern Dating: If Your Tie Isn’t Straight, Then You Don’t Love Her

 The Unspoken Rule Of Modern Dating: If Your Tie Isn’t Straight, Then You Don’t Love Her 

If your tie isn’t straight, if your shoes aren’t set on the rug by the door, if your dishes are left on the counter by the sink, then you don’t love her.

See, it’s always been about the little things.

The smallest gestures that show you love someone. That say silently and unconsciously, she’s on your mind.

When you truly love someone, it fills every crease and crevice of your life. You think of that person, their desires, their wants and needs, and you become tuned into those things because they matter. Because that person matters.

You don’t leave your dishes by the sink because it only takes another minute to rinse them and put them in the dishwasher. You don’t walk around the house with shoes on because you know she appreciates her freshly-vacuumed floors.

You put your tie on straight because that shows you looked in the mirror. That you wanted to make yourself presentable. That you thought of not only yourself, but of her, and desired to look your best, because she’s yours and you’re hers.

And those little things matter when you’re in love.
If your tie isn’t straight, you don’t love her.

It’s not because you’re lazy, or forgetful, or made a mistake. It’s because you overlooked this little thing. Which builds into bigger things, which suddenly becomes an attitude of nonchalance. Of indifference. Of falling out of love.

See, when your tie’s straight, you were purposeful. You were dedicated. You wanted things to be right, even the little things. Because little things matter. Because you love her, and your appearance is a reflection of who you are—your happiness, your confidence, and your representation of two people, not just one.

It sounds stupid, doesn’t it? That a lopsided tie could suddenly landslide into something much bigger. But it’s the principle of it. The idea that you didn’t look in the mirror. Didn’t ask her to give you a once-over. Didn’t lean into her for a good morning, a good afternoon, a goodnight kiss where she would have immediately pulled back, furrowed her eyebrows, and righted that off-kilter tie.

You didn’t think to involve her in this seemingly mundane part of your life. And it turns out, these moments actually matter more than you think.

Maybe it’s stupid, to proclaim that a tie matters so much.

But maybe it isn’t. Maybe modern-day love really is built on those little moments. Built upon the way we lean into one another, and the way we carry ourselves, show ourselves to the world, boldly proclaiming that Yes, my tie is straight. And yes, I am in love. And I’m proud to show it.

7 Positive Things To Embrace About Modern Dating That Will Make It A Little Less Painful

 7 Positive Things To Embrace About Modern Dating That Will Make It A Little Less Painful 

Whether you’ve been ghosted more than once, or have received one too many dick pics on tinder, we can all agree that modern dating can suck a big one, but there’s got to be some way we can see the silver lining. Make modern dating a little less painful by embracing the lighter side of unsolicited dick pics and all other things this digital twist on love has presented us with.

1. More sex.

Who doesn’t want more sex? With the ability to constantly be in contact with basically anyone who’s everyone, we can have a shit ton of sex with whoever we’d like, whenever we’d like. Even if it’s with fuckboi down the street who calls you Sweet Thang, sex is sex, and sometimes we just need it. Luckily, modern dating has taught us there’s an app for that, or a simple three letter text message, ‘U up?’

2. If you never want to talk to someone again, you don’t have to.

When the guy who’s got a sore ego from you not sleeping with him won’t stop texting you, there’s a block for that. Modern dating allows us to shut people out completely, which is great when you want (or desperately need) it to happen. When that girl on tinder won’t stop asking you if you think she’s pretty, there’s a block for that too. We now have the ability to block all the crazies out of our life for
good.

3. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

Quite literally if you’re a member on Plenty Of Fish. With the multitude of dating apps out there, you can now pick exactly what type of person you want to date, from farmers to Christians or whatever else you’re into, there’s an online community waiting for you to dive in. For every person who breaks your heart there’s 100 more online waiting to meet you. Sure, we think we know what we want, and most of the time we’re completely wrong, but our endless options will allow us to learn, and if we never learn then we’ll just keep looking.

4. When you are in love, you can share it with the world.

Ever hate those couples who flaunt their undying love for one another on social media? Well, when you fall in love you have the ability to be one of them. As soon as you lock down a significant other, you can’t help but instagram a cliche couple photo with a heart emoji caption. LOVE is in the air, and it’s also taking over your news feed.

5. When you hate love, you can share it with the world.

The great thing about modern dating? When we are SO fed up with it, that we literally want to punch ourselves in the throat, we can vent about it to the entire world on the internet.

6. We can stalk our exes.

While this can be diabolical to the ‘moving on and letting go‘ process, we always want to see what our exes are up to, luckily now we can. Your inner stalker has finally found relief, with Snapchat, Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, we can see exactly what and who are exes are doing…until they block you from all of them, but even then, there’s Google.

7. We can plot revenge on our exes (we’ve all thought about it).

That moment you open Snapchat and watch his Story to see him at a bar nearby, and put on that dress that makes your A boobs look like Cs, then you run into him acting like it’s an accident…it’s a mild revenge, but it still feels extremely satisfying, and it’s possible because of modern dating.

101 Tinder Pick Up Lines That Are Way Better Than Just Saying ‘Hi’

 101 Tinder Pick Up Lines That Are Way Better Than Just Saying ‘Hi’ 

1.

You seem awesome and I like awesome people
2.

Tacos sometime? Check yes or no.
3.

What’s the weirdest message you’ve ever gotten on here from someone?
4.

Star Wars or Trek? There is only one right answer.
5.

Are you emotionally unavailable or emotionally damaged?
6.

Be honest. Which member of 1D is your fave?
7.

Hey, I’m looking for a ski-ball partner. You in?
8.

If we vote opposite on November 2nd, can we still be friends?
9.
10.

Know how much a polar bear weighs? Well it’s enough to break the ice. Hi!
11.

My mom told me not to talk to strangers online, but I’ll make an exception for you.
12.

Sorry for all of the gross messages you probably get here 😕
13.

Tell you what I want, what I really want. A) To know, who was your favorite Spice Girl? and B) Your number?
14.

Want to engage in a textually active relationship?
15.
16.

I bet you’re more cool IRL than via URL.
17.

Are you a big spoon, a little spoon, or a “GTFO of my bed I’m TIRED!”?
18.

Are you a little more country or a little more rock n’ roll?
19.

What’s the most embarrassing thing I’ll find if I Google you?
20.

I think you’re attractive and would love to get to know you without a screen involved.
21.

Do you believe in reincarnation? And if so, who/what do you think Chris Farley came back as?
22.

I can’t wait for you mom to say, “He/She could do better…” after meeting me.
23.

Would you have talked to me in middle school, or just stared at me awkwardly from across the cafeteria? No judgement.
24.
25.

I won’t set my phone to silent just in case there’s a chance I’ll hear from you.
26.

🎶Hello…it’s me…🎶

(Do you think Adele regrets that song?)
27.

What sort of opener would get you to talk to me?
28.

Wanna be pen pals?
29.

Dogs or cats? There is only one right answer.
30.

Were you an N’SYNC or a Backstreet Boys fan? How will we raise the kids?
31.

Swear to drunk I’m not God…just intoxicated by you.
32.

You know what would be great? Talking to you.
33.

What was the most random class in college you ever took and secretly were super into?
34.

I’m watching The Notebook and crying and need to be talked off a ledge. Help?
35.

I have a problem. I went grocery shopping and there’s no way I can carry all of these bags inside by myself. Wanna do a stranger a solid? I can wait…
36.

QUICK. Which rom com is your fave?
37.

We can tell our kids that we met because I accidentally stole your yellow umbrella…
38.

Would you rather have toes for fingers or fingers for toes?
39.
40.

I have to be honest, the thought of being around in you in person makes me really nervous but I’m willing to go through it if you’ll go out with me.
41.

In the words of a 2002 Budweiser commercial, wassup?
42.
43.

Which Disney Channel Original Movie is your all time favorite?
44.

Are you a ketchup or mustard kind of guy/girl?
45.

So who/what do you blame your dating profile on?
46.

Drink of choice?
47.

Favorite day of the week?
48.

Which Meryl is the best Meryl?
49.

Which Beyoncé is the best Beyoncé? (Jokes every Bey is perfect.)
50.

I can’t wait for you to talk shit about me to all of your friends.
51.
52.

Team Jennifer or Team Jolie?
53.

Bitch about how terrible online dating is & chill?
54.

Are you Catfishing someone? Just checking…
55.

Want to get dinner sometime? (Yeah, I’m old fashioned.)
56.
57.

What is the best compliment you’ve ever received so I know how to flatter you in the future?
58.

I don’t want to intimidate you but, I made a doctor’s appointment without asking my mom for help this week. No biggie. *slicks hair back*
59.

Need someone to listen to you complain about that bitch from work for an hour?
60.

Fuck, marry, kill. Ellen, Oprah, Chelsea Handler?
61.

If you had been on the Titanic instead of Jack, I bet Rose would have made room for you on the headboard.
62.

Are you more GOT or LOTR?
63.

Did you know that if you hit return a bunch while texting, leave two dashes and a long bracket beneath them, you make a very happy whale? You’re welcome.
64.

I’m writing a book and could use your help. It’s a phone book and it’s missing your number.
65.

Tell me a story.
66.

🤘out with your ⌨ out (message me back plz!)
67.

How long ’till you think we both give up and make a “when we’re 45…” pact with each other?
68.
69.

I seem to have lost my hesitation with talking to strangers online, can I borrow some of yours?
70.

Fuck, marry, kill. Bradley Cooper, Ryan Reynolds, Ryan Gosling?
71.
72.

Real Talk. Who would you want on your team during a zombie apocalypse?
73.

‘Hej’ is ‘Hi’ in Danish. (And you learn something new every day.)
74.

If I ask you to coffee, drinks, or a movie which would you be most likely to say ‘yes’ to?
75.

Favorite pick up line. GO!
76.

Follow me on Instagram? (Jk I just wanted to stalk your selfies)
77.

Look up the symbols for Hydrogen and Iodine and that’s what I have to say to you.
78.

Sup boo (sorry I couldn’t pull that off but it’s nice to unofficially meet you)
79.

What emoji is your spirit emoji?
80.

Your phone has GPS right? Because I’m totally going to get lost in those *insert color here* eyes.
81.

You look like you’d be fun to sit next to in bed with while we both stare at our phones.
82.

I didn’t sleep all night because I couldn’t stop thinking about whether or not you’d messaged me back!
83.

What’s up buttercup
84.

Can we be friends?
85.
86.

u up? (…to have actually stimulating conversation because I am!)
87.

What’s something no one would guess about you from a first impression?
88.

I can Google how to say Hi in like, 101 languages. Wanna see?
89.

You seem cool. Wanna get to know each other?
90.

Do you know how I can get verified on Twitter? Asking for a friend…
91.

If you come across someone you know on Tinder, what’s your protocol? Left or right?
92.

I’m bored, help me out?
93.

If you were a booger I’d pick you first.
94.

Are you a Kelly, a Michelle, or a Beyoncé?
95.

Let’s go do something fun.
96.

Want to go get drunk and make some bad decisions?
97.

If I say just hi with a smiley face, will you ignore me?
98.

You seem really funny and I like people who make me laugh.
99.
100.

Want to go talk about where we went to college and what we “do” over overpriced beer?
101.

A list on the internet told me saying hi was boring, but I still want to say hi to you. So…hi.

LeBron James’s Greatest Quotes

LeBron James’s Greatest Quotes

Here are 26 of Lebron’s greatest quotes that will elevate your motivation:

1. “I think, team first. It allows me to succeed, it allows my team to succeed.”

2. “You have to be able to accept failure to get better.”

3. “I don’t need too much. Glamour and all that stuff don’t excite me. I am just glad I have the game of basketball in my life.”

4. “There’s that moment every morning when you look in the mirror: Are you committed, or are you not?”


6. “Every night on the court I give my all, and if I’m not giving 100 percent, I criticize myself.”

7. “Commitment is a big part of what I am and what I believe. How committed are you to winning? How committed are you to being a good friend?”

8. “I always say, decisions I make, I live with them. There’s always ways you can correct them or ways you can do them better. At the end of the day, I live with them.”

9. “Warren Buffet told me, follow your gut. When you have that gut feeling, you have to go with it don’t go back on it.”

10. “Ask me to play, I’ll play. Ask me to shoot, I’ll shoot. Ask me to pass, I’ll pass. Ask me to steal, block out, sacrifice, lead, dominate. Anything! But it’s not just what you ask of me. It’s what I ask of myself.”

11. “I mean, when you grow up in the inner city and you grow up in a single-parent household, that’s – those are humbling times, you know?”

12. “Greatness is defined by how much you want to put into what you do.”

13. “Everywhere I’ve been, I’ve been the best player. I love being a leader, and I love being the best. I just want to get better. It’s not about being cocky or selfish or anything like that. It’s just how I am.”

14. “Once you become a professional athlete or once you do anything well, then you’re automatically a role model. I have no problem being a role model. I love it. I have kids looking up to me and hopefully I inspire these kids to do good things.”

15. “I’ve always been a leader. I’ve always kind of been the tallest person on the team when I was younger but always kind of the smartest. I was ahead of my time. I wasn’t always the oldest, I kind of was the youngest on the team, but, I kind of knew what to do at times.”

16. “I hear that word pressure all the time. There is a lot of pressure put on me, but I don’t put a lot of pressure on myself. I feel if I play my game, it will take care of itself.”

17. “In the next 15 or 20 years, I hope I’ll be the richest man in the world. That’s one of my goals. I want to be a billionaire. I want to get to a position where generation on generation don’t have to worry about nothing.”

18. “It’s hard to win in the league, because every team is good, they got players on their team. A lot harder than high school. It’s competitive, and that’s what I most love about it.”

19. “Sometimes in the past when I played something might make me lose focus, or I would go home after a game where I thought I could have played better and I would let it hang over my head for a long time when it shouldn’t. But now, being a parent, I go home and see my son and I forget about any mistake I ever made or the reason I’m upset. I get home and my son is smiling or he comes running to me. It has just made me grow as an individual and grow as a man.”


21. “I like criticism. It makes you strong.”

22. “Ever since I was a kid, I was always the winner.”

23. “To be honest, the play that was drawn up, I scratched it. I just told coach, ‘Give me the ball.’ We’re either going to go to overtime or I’m going to win it for us. It was that simple.”

24. “I feel confident because I’m the best player in the world. It’s that simple.”

25. “If you put everything together as far as my mind, my body, my game. If you put everything in one bottle, this is probably the best I’ve been.”

26. “When I have a bad game, it continues to humble me and know that, you know, you still have work to do and you still have a lot of people to impress.”

16 Things You Should Finally Learn To Let Go Of In Your Mid-Twenties

 16 Things You Should Finally Learn To Let Go Of In Your Mid-Twenties 

1.

The idea that there is just one perfect person out there who exists solely to be with you, instead of several potential partners you could possibly make a life with.
2.

The urge to apologize for things you know you don’t need to apologize for.
3.

The belief that finding a career where you can ‘do what you love’ means that you won’t ever have to do any hard work.
4.

The way of thinking we’ve all grown accustomed to in which we are convinced that we can find out everything we’ll ever need to know about someone simply by using the phone in our hands.
5.

The idea that a fun, relaxing weekend always needs to include a ton of social activities with every single person you know.
6.

The desire to compete with everyone around you for the ‘ideal life’ instead of simply focusing on yourself and what it is that would truly make you happy.
7.

The instinctive tendency to hold yourself back or play aloof when you finally meet someone you like, because you’ve been told that these games are what is ‘normal’ in the dating world.
8.

The belief that hard work alone makes you deserving of any raise, promotion, or job that you want.
9.

The belief that you need to explain yourself and your life choices to every single person that questions you or doubts you.
10.

The idea that saying ‘thank you’ is a waste of time.
11.

The (typically subconscious) belief that you should only be kind to someone if it will benefit you in some way.
12.

The rationalizations you’ve made with yourself over how your body will always be able to bounce back from repeated poor behaviors like over-drinking and unhealthy eating.
13.

The belief that if a friendship naturally fizzles out, it automatically means that you’re a bad person or friend.
14.

The idea that you’ll always be capable of changing anyone and everyone for the better.
15.

The belief that the things happening in the worlds far away from yours are not your responsibility.
16.

The idea that it’s always too late for a newly discovered dream.